Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him. Genesis 2:18 RSV
In the Book of Genesis, God creates all the animals and then He creates the Man, His image reflected in human flesh. I first want to state that man is a separate creation from the creatures of the earth and IS NOT an animal by God’s definition. God saw that Man was alone, unlike all His other living creatures, so He decided to create for him a help suitable for him. God caused a sleep to come over Adam, and brought a rib out in order to fashion the woman. Eve is not a clone of him, but it is a separate, biologically distinct creation that is nevertheless a complementary part of mankind. So while we share a common humanity, we are biologically different.
The question has arisen in recent times, whether God intended for man to be polygamous. The primary thing in the Bible that rules against this is that God twice had the opportunity to provide multiple partners for man and He didn’t. At the Creation and at the Flood, God chose to have one man, one woman as the ideal to carry on mankind. In considering this problem, I play the opposition and ask the question, what rules against man being polygamous? Why would being polygamous not be in God’s gameplan? I think the key goes back to the original directive God gave to the man and to the woman, to “be fruitful, multiply and replenish the earth.” I’m going to call this command, God’s Imperative. While they are to produce children, and produce them exponentially, the purpose of all this is to replenish the earth, to fill it at the correct proportions. At current, there are near 7.5 billion people upon the earth. In 1900, that was 1.6 billion. So we can see that when man multiplies at a high rate, it overruns the earth. So, if God had given man multiple partners they would have multiplied faster than God intended.
This one male, one female pattern can be seen further throughout the Bible. Animals on the Ark were assembled by pairs. The majority of people mentioned in the Bible were monogamous. At the Flood, not only the animals, but the humans also had only one mate. In scripture after scripture, man is directed to enjoy his wife, not wives. To be satisfied with his wife. Jesus reinforces this ideal when he says that God made two in the beginning. It is true that God did not condemn polygamy in general but it was never his ideal. Abraham had serial wives; Isaac had one wife; Jacob would have chosen only one wife but through deceit and his wives concern for having children, he ended up with two wives and two concubines. Men were allowed to take extra wives in wartime. David also had multiple wives. God did not condemn these relationships because it did not violate His imperative.
Monogamy has been the most stable factor in human history, so one has to ask that if male was naturally polygamous, why there have not been more polygamous societies. It’s because some men choose not to be monogamous. Some men are not satisfied with one wife. And this has been borne out in a recent scientific study. Men and women experience lust, which is natural to our carnal natures, always wanting more than we have.
The Red Pill (and more specifically Rollo Tomassi) puts forward the evolutionary theory that Men are by nature polygamous (Male Imperative) and that Women are by nature both hypergamous (seeking the highest quality mate–the Female Imperative) and monogamous (seeking commitment). I’ve already stated that evolution is not true, it is theoretical in nature, and violates the tenets of the Bible. Rollo in many instances disparages the Bible.
The Male Imperative then is contrary to God’s Imperative of one man, one woman and the directive to replenish the earth. It is born out of man’s lust. While polygamy was allowed, as Christians we should seek God’s ideal and not man’s. The Apostle Paul directs men to have their own wife (again, implying monogamy). Neither the Mosaic Law nor Christianity condones men having harems of unmarried women, of having man exploit the sexuality of women, which the Red Pill and Rollo Tomassi condone. In fact, Rollo in one place tells men they should avoid getting married. He developed something called plate theory and believes powerful men, these “alpha males” should only pursue their self-interest and it is within their self-interest to keep many options open (women as plates) in order to avoid what he calls Oneitis. While Oneitis (the soulmate theory) is false, I would call the Male Imperative a half-truth. It does not meet God’s ideal.
Which brings us to the Female Imperative. How does the Female Imperative measure against God’s Imperative? If woman is naturally hypergamous, that is, she is seeking the most dominant, attractive and powerful mate to marry, that would not meet the ideals of Christianity. Christianity is based not on the natural man, but the spiritual. So, in Christianity, it is not the natural man that matters to God’s kingdom, but the spiritual man. While we all as humans want to have a valuable companion to spend our life with and build the Kingdom of God, women who profess godliness are not looking for any of the qualities suggested by hypergamy, but rather the qualities of a godly husband–provision, protection, and spiritual leadership. Qualities of physical beauty and attractiveness are subjective. In terms of woman seeking commitment in a relationship, of seeking a mate who can meet her needs for safety and security for herself and her children I would say that that portion of the Female Imperative is true. So, also, in terms of God’s Imperative, the Female Imperative is also a half-truth.
God wants us to find a mate that is suitable, both for His directive of replenishing the earth (which is less urgent in these times) and of building the Kingdom of God, building spiritually sound Christian families. He isn’t interested in man’s lustful desire for more than one woman, or in woman’s need for an attractive, powerful mate. He is interested in Christian families, which meets man’s and woman’s needs for companionship, love and stability within our society and the church. A monogamous, loving relationship is God’s Imperative.
Pamela Parizo © 2017